My father is having an affair with God
Last night he picked up his phone and whispered to the other end that
he would be there soon
Shoved his keys into his jeans and slammed the door
Left my living room pregnant with cologne scented silence
Three hours later I knew he was back because
his headlights danced on my bedroom walls and cast
phantom masks on my knick knacks
He sat in his car for twenty minutes before the lights went off
I imagine he emerges from His chamber each night
tangled in white shrouds
the star kissed linoleum tiles,
reminding him to get home
He has another life
Before God came into the picture my dad was
the first act of a Greek tragedy
He had it all figured out and I knew him well
I thought
I knew him so well
The Rabbis teach you to admire those people
Preparing the dead is the kindest deed you can do
they say
My father, I guess
I admire him
Mom says “It is not easy to do His work”
while she prepares his dinner
She says she is proud of him, when I ask
but
she doesn’t say she tried once and
couldn’t stop hearing voices
Seeing their profiles beneath white sheets
When I was seven, my brother and I saw a movie where
a man’s face melted off like jelly
We held our palms on our eyes and screamed but my dad just laughed
and then I noticed
his eyes colorless and sunken like
a corpse
regarding death with ease
a rendezvous, a lover's bed
